Family First

"But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." 1 Timothy 5:8 (NAS)

With no end of needs in your community and beyond, how do you know where to start trying to meet them?

You start at home.  Your family needs you to set the example of being the hands and feet of Jesus to others, including them.  Take care of yourself--body, mind, and spirit--so you can take care of your family's physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.  Then work with your family, not independently of them, to meet needs in your church, job, extended family, neighborhood, and social circle as you are able.

If you're habitually being short with your household members because you're preoccupied with taking care of business, it's time for a priority evaluation.  If you're not sure how you're doing, pray, then ask the people you live with, and humbly consider their responses.

"So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, who ever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you." Colossians 3:12-13 (NAS)

Let God's peace and provision set the atmosphere in your home, and let His love radiate outward from there.

Perfectly Legal

"'I have the right to do anything,' you say--but not everything is beneficial.  'I have the right to do anything,'--but I will not be mastered by anything." 1 Corinthians 6:12 (NIV)

As a mama of small children, I was careful about what I let them eat, drink, watch, and listen to.  Often I was asked, "What's so bad about it?"  I started telling people that was the wrong question.  "These are my precious babies," I said.  "What's so good about this food, this drink, this music, this book, this movie, that I should put it into their bodies or their minds?"

Yes, marijuana is legal in some states.  Slavery was legal in many times and places throughout history.  Legal is not synonymous with moral, ethical, right, or good.  Smoking might be legal, but is that the greatest investment for your time, money, body, and mind?  Maybe the show you're watching isn't that bad.  Is that all the higher your standards go?

"'I have the right to do anything,' you say--but not everything is beneficial.  'I have the right to do anything,'--but not everything is constructive.  No one should seek their own good, but the good of others." 1 Corinthians 10:23-24 (NIV)

Next time it crosses your mind that whatever you're involved in isn't that bad, up your game.  If it doesn't glorify God, trade it for something that does.

No Lone Wolves

"Come near to God and he will come near to you.  Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded."  James 4:8 (NIV)

Do you feel isolated?  Lonely?  Wondering whether God remembers you?

What are you doing about it?

Start with prayer.  Not just requests, but gratitude--recognition of all He has done for you and given to you.  Read the Bible, whichever part speaks to you right now.  Jesus' parables, the prophets' warnings, ancient miracles, apostles' admonitions.  Now find other believers to connect with.

If you feel alone, maybe it's because you are.

"Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make a helper suitable for him.'"  Genesis 2:18 (NAS)

If even God Himself thought that He and all the animals on earth weren't enough companionship for a man, then why do we so often tell ourselves, "I don't need anybody else"?

We were designed for relationships, with God and with each other.  Taking care of your own self and meeting your own needs is not what being an adult is all about.  That's just being a big kid.  Adulting is taking care of yourself so you can take care of others.  We're supposed to be here for each other.

"But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called 'Today,' so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin."  Hebrews 3:13 (NAS)

Care for your family.  Join a local church.  Find some good friends.  BE a good friend.

A Long Forgotten Word

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,

Meekness, temperance, against such there is no law."  Galatians 5:22-23 (KJV)

The word temperance has been interpreted as self-control, which we tend to think of as avoiding overindulgence.  We should practice discretion and restraint, but that perception of temperance is a little cold.

Rather than reducing temperance to the idea of enforcing proper boundaries on your inner child, recognize it as allowing our thoughts, feelings, motives, desires, intentions, and actions to be tempered by the Holy Spirit.

Allow God to take away your fear of sharing the gospel with someone who's ready to receive it.  Let Him shut your mouth when you want to impose your beliefs on someone whose heart is still hard.  Cast your cares on Him so you can set aside your stresses and be the person your family needs you to be in the moment.  Ask and take His advice when it's time to address those stresses.

"And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; 

And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; 

And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. 

For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ."  2 Peter 1:5-8 (KJV)

Let every part of your life be tempered by the Holy Spirit, and expect amazing results.

"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans."  Proverbs 16:3 (NIV)

Clean Yourself Up

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."  Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)

When we swear we tend to think, was it really that bad? We should be asking if it was really that good.

Profanity has one purpose, and that is to offend.  Throwing around words that denote filth, blasphemy, degradation, or violence is an act of aggression.  If your speech is seasoned with curse words yet you don’t believe you are trying to antagonize, ask yourself what exactly you are trying to do.  And whatever it is, find a better way to do it.

If your squad influences you to swear, find better friends.  Jesus said if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out.  (Matthew 5, Matthew 18)  Your coworkers' bad language rubs off on you?  Find a healthier work environment.

Obscenity debases both the speaker and the hearer.  Consciously or not, people think less of a foul-mouthed person.

Rather than being an excuse to continue, the idea that “those words are so common they aren’t even bad anymore,” is actually another reason to knock it off.  If those words are intended to shock or to underscore your point, they’ve been rendered ineffective.  And if you have a need for terms that are demeaning, maybe your subject matter itself is inappropriate. 

You're not likely to use a hundred-dollar bill as a dustpan, or take a luxury sedan off road mud bogging, so don't waste the gift of speech on abusive words.  Find a more sophisticated, more intelligent way to express your thoughts.

"But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken."  Matthew 12:36 (NIV)

What will you have to say then?  Make this your prayer:

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart 

Be acceptable in your sight,

O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer."  Psalm 19:14 (NAS)